People in Groups: Always a Power Struggle

In the preamble to the first Lord of the Rings movie, Fellowship of the Ring, the "Lady of the Woods" elf Geladriel (played by Cate Blanchett) explains the origin of the conflict about the special Ring of Power that the evil spirit Sauron used to bind under his domination all of the rings he "gifted" to the different nations of beings.  To the nine men-kings he bestowed each with a ring, for more than anything they coveted power.  Yet upon each's passing, they found themselves completely bound to Sauron, abject slaves to his will. Still, to the extent that they could strike terror in the hearts of ordinary people, I suppose that they would have derived much pleasure from this evil bullying.  I think J.R.R. Tolkien, the author of this fantasy series, had much insight into the basic, rank human nature that is much more universal among our species.  The truth is that you can't get three people together into a group without them sorting out their respective ranks...from top to bottom.  I'm not just theorizing this: I've lived it, going on 69 years come this October.  Barbara Streisand once sang, "People who need people are the luckiest people in the world."  But beyond the benefits and protections that an advanced civil society can bestow on me, I find it annoying, demeaning and stifling to find myself entangled within groups...and I'm sick of that sorting of pecking orders. Just before the Beatles broke up in late 1969, there were two group meetings, one on the 8th and the other on the 20th.  In the earlier meeting, John Lennon made the all-too-reasonable proposal that he, Paul and George each be accorded four songs on their future albums, with one or two given to Ringo. Paul, full of his perceived role as the the group's leader, rejected John's offer.  After Lennon's successful concert adventure a few days later, he announced his "divorce" from the Beatles on that second meeting twelve days later.  There was a flexibility, a willingness to work things out, in Lennon's original proposal, but people stuck in their minds with power aren't rationally reasoning things out.  The general problem I personally see in this translates into all social situations, whereby there are individuals consumed with their own sense of standing within the group, and they will sabotage any meaningful input from me while putting me down in what they regard as my "proper place". I am so sensitive to this that I don't even want to "show up" in some of the gatherings offered at church or in connection to the Parkruns I frequent...and when I was at the post office I tended to avoid union meetings: now it's retirement reunions I steer clear of.  But you know, I can always attend and just sit in the back and keep my mouth shut or just engage in small talk...