Loud and Aggressive People

Max Erhmann, in his famous poetic exhortation Desiderata, urges the reader to “avoid loud and aggressive people; they are vexations to the spirit”. I certainly agree wholeheartedly with this as a general principle; who wants be around bullies and blabbermouths? Sometimes, though, one just must learn how to negotiate through unavoidable relationships with these types. But I’d just prefer to avoid them altogether. I also have a bit broader interpretation than most probably do of what constitutes a “loud and aggressive” person.

There are those whose overt demeanor would seem to disqualify them for a “loud and aggressive” designation; they may have soft voices and project a relatively pacifist, friendly image in their social interactions. But if they spread slander and gossip about others (behind their backs, of course) with their soft voices, and use other, more physically aggressive people to do their dirty work for them, then I’d also have to include these types as part of the thoroughly avoidable “loud and aggressive” crowd. And this more subtle group is more insidious and harder to ferret out. Even so, there is something about an up-front, obnoxiously pushy person that pushes my buttons! But at least with them, I can overtly stand my ground and give an assertive response. With the “stealth” aggressors, any confrontation on my part with them will be attributed to “my” aggressive nature, so simple avoidance is probably the best strategy.